Have you ever met someone who just seems cold and distant? They don’t know how to carry on a conversation and when they do, their responses are often biting and totally insensitive.
Right or wrong, we write people off as unkind, mean, or downright bad if they don’t have relationship skills. Here are five signs you’re not relatable:
- You’re not relatable if you don’t make eye-contact. Whether we’re in a hurry, insecure, or feel out of your element, oftentimes refusing to make eye-contact with another person says to them, “you’re not important and I don’t really want to be here, I can’t wait until we get away from each other.” This feeling will destroy not only your career, but your family.
- You’re not relatable if you don’t learn the fine art of listening. How many of us simply tolerate another’s conversation in order to speak our mind? If people are convinced you’re not listening, it’s one of the most disrespectful things you can do at home, in the marketplace, or on a sales call. Be more interested in them than you are in your sales speech.
- You’re not relatable if you can’t demonstrate a generous spirit. This is a tough one because this can’t be faked, at least not for long. Generosity is something that comes from within you. It was Jesus who said, “I’ve come to give you life and to give you life more abundantly.” He talked about living waters that would flow from inside out. People who are generous have experience grace and generosity themselves. And their humility and their great blessings flow over in signs of generosity. If you are stingy, negative, and gossipy people will assume the worst about you. Remember, when you cut other people down, the person you’re talking to will also assume you’ll do the same to you.
- You’re not relatable if you’re not learning. The point is, in every relationship there has to be conversation. And that conversation has to be more than just the box scores of the latest baseball game. Learning makes you interesting. It makes you relatable. It gives you insight into what other people are going through. If you’re not reading, exploring, stretching, and growing, you’re not relatable because you’ll have no content to relate to.
- You’re not relatable if you don’t like yourself. Yeah, believe it or not, if you don’t feel good about yourself, you feel insecure, empty, if you’re mad, bitter, and resentful, you’ll be like an emotional porcupine that people don’t want to be around or touch because the slightest thing can set you off.
If you take this little test and find that you’re not relatable, here is the good news: each one of these can be fixed. And you can start fixing them today by being self-aware and asking those closest to you to read through these and tell you where you stand in each of these categories.